Clemens Suspension: 5 Games Is Nice, 10 Would Be Better

Even when we screw up we wind up screwing up. Jeez! I told Torre to have Clemens plunk that Toronto fella in the back in the hopes that he'd get a lengthy suspension. I mean, have you seen the guy's record? He's 4-5 and I'm paying him roughly the GNP of a small country to "pitch" for us this year!

So what do those weenies in the league office do? They suspend him for all of 5 freakin' games. That doesn't help us! This guy is losing 56% of his games and I have to put him back into the starting rotation again after a 5-game suspension?

What does a guy have to do to get a 10- or 20-game suspension around here? If steroids will do the trick I'll be happy to inject 'em in his butt myself!